Social Media Abstinence VS. Social Media Curation
Let’s Stop Talking about Social Media Abstinence and Start Talking about Social Media Curation
As I write this, I’m 7 months pregnant. It’s my second pregnancy and it’s been more physically challenging than the first. As a result, I’m not as active as I imagined I’d be. Chasing my 3-year-old around has proved to be my physical limit most days. When I share this with friends and family, they are incredibly supportive. My mom tribe tells me “just take care of yourself, you’re doing great.” My husband tells me, “let me help, it’s OK.” And I feel…OK. Even accepting of this season.
And then…I go on Instagram. And I’m hit with a post from a beautiful pregnant mama about her daily routine for staying fit. And then, an ad for an online pregnancy fitness program. And I feel…Not OK. Not accepting.
Sound familiar? I hear a version of this from clients, especially the young women I see, all the time. The answer seems obvious, right?
STOP GOING ON SOCIAL MEDIA.
But here’s the thing…it’s just not doable for most people. It’s become so embedded in our lives and, there’s a lot of positive to be gained from it, so most people just aren’t very successful at giving it up, or even reducing it significantly.
Instead, I talk to my clients about curating their feeds to protect their mental space.
So if I were my own therapist, I’d say, don’t spend any time on that pregnancy fitness post, fly by it. Look for posts from content creators who show real life – I love this trend of people showing their “non-aesthetic homes” (side note – can someone please create an account showing a “non-aesthetic” pregnancy?…I wanna see you on the couch, in your giant thrift store t shirt, no makeup, watching Project Runway because that’s about all ya got in ya).
When you find something that makes you feel seen, linger on it, share it, tell the app you like this, not that. Eventually, you’ll start to see more of what validates you and less of what harms you. And, PAY ATTENTION TO HOW YOU FEEL. If you’ve been on Tik Tok for 10 minutes and you’re feeling kind of low…go ahead and close it. If you’re feeling uplifted…let it roll.
Your mental space is precious. Curate what comes into it with care.
